Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Good god: A lunch hour tale.

I ventured to Macy's over my lunch hour to attempt to find some new flip-flops. That was a pretty decent fail. However, I was annoyed numerous times before I even walked through the doors of Macy's - warning me that I should not be allowed in public today.

Annoyance #1: Do not plow your way into the elevator until you know the people on it have gotten off. There honestly is nothing more annoying. Wait THREE MEASLY SECONDS. It's not that hard. That way, you don't run into the pregnant lady trying to find comfortable shoes.

Annoyance #2: You're on your way to lunch, not doing a triathlon. Therefore, running me over with your tacky handbag and paperback is not necessary just because you need to get to Au Bon Pain to buy a $10 salad and sit on your polyester covered ass for an hour.

Annoyance #3: Makeup counter ladies. When needed, you are nothing short of helpful. When I'm walking by you with my hot mac & cheese, sweating and being a "I don't care about my appearance today" pregnant lady, now's not the time. Seriously.

First lady at the NARS counter: OMG! I love your glasses! Too cute!
Sweaty, hungry me: Thanks! I actually bought them here.
Second NARS lady: You could really use some "Babe" on your lips.
First NARS lady: OMG - yes - let's do a makeup trial!!!!!!
Me: (trying to remember what I look like today, and remembering I indeed look like shit and "Babe" will do nothing to save me)
Me: No thanks, gotta eat while it's still warm! (nervous, crabby laugh)

So, now I'm back at my desk, after having inhaled that mac & cheese in about 5 minutes. And I'm still starving.

On the other annoying note for the day (that I'll probably get hate mail for) - I've officially gained 10 pounds in this pregnancy. This is good, and all on schedule...but it's weird. I've just never weighed this much in my entire life. I'm glad I'm finally gaining weight like I should. I just need to scale back the "eat whatever the eff I want" plan and get more fruits & veggies in there so I don't put on another 10 in the next two weeks. :)


  1. I'm at 20 weeks too and I am also up 10 pounds! I read that it's right on track, but it's still crazy to me too.

  2. I'm sure you'll sneeze after birth and it'll come right off. Want me to send you some sort of prenatal sit-n-be-fit-while-you-eat-mac-n-cheese workout DVD? They must make one of those, right?

  3. I've actually done multiple blog posts about elevator etiquette. Things people do in those things royally piss me off. Oh, and have you tried the Old Navy metallic flip-flops? They are cute, cheap and actually kind of comfortable.