Someone have the phone number for Hair Club for Men?

No, seriously.

I cannot even believe how much hair I am losing. I read that this would happen. I also read that my hair would get thicker with pregnancy. IT DIDN'T.

I really shouldn't complain, my hair has always been pretty thick. I would always lose a bit every day in the shower, but I'm pulling out handfuls now. There are enough tresses in my drain catch to give Barbie a hair transplant. But what can I do? A big fat NOTHING.

Thankfully, even though showering feels like a scene in a horror movie, I'm not really noticing my hair being thinner. Yet. (And by typing said words, I probably just cursed myself.)

In other news, I had my abdomen ultrasound-ed yesterday. It was really weird. I mean, I was watching the tech show me all my organs on the screen and kept thinking that it was only like, 10 months ago that I saw my little girl on the screen for the first time.  I was waiting for him to find my liver and say "and there's the baby!" or something like that. ::shudder:: If I heard those words again so soon...gah. Speaking of horror movies...

Anyway - no word yet from the doctor. If I was a betting lady (which I am) I would say there were no stones in that ultrasound. Just a big ol' empty gallbladder. I wish the doc would just call me so I can find out.

Four more days until I go back to work...

I'm getting an ultrasound tomorrow.

No, dear internets, I am not knocked up again, THANK YOU BABY JESUS.

Lately, the dreaded avocado episodes are back. Indeed they were triggered by guacamole consumption (so sue me) and now the old gallbladder is just acting like a bitch again and hurting me all the time.

I was almost fully convinced I wasn't going to need any treatment for it after I had Abby because it seemed I could eat anything and everything I hadn't been able to while it was acting up. But I hadn't attempted the dreaded avocado. And then I did and then my gallbladder (AKA Vincent*) was all "OH NO YOU DI'ENT" and then I nearly died from pain.

So, I saw a loverly doctor today who scheduled me for an ultrasound of my jerky abdomen tomorrow morning at 8am (8 hours of no food beforehand?! They'd better start that thing at 8am ON THE DOT) to see if I've got some stones hanging out in there. I'm almost hoping there are, because the simple solution to relieve me of my pain is to yank the sucker out. She'd like to do it this week, if possible.

At first I panicked at the prospect of more time in the hospital, but in reality, as long as I don't have to vaginally deliver my gallbladder I'm pretty sure this will be a walk in the park.

In other news, Abby will be 3 months old tomorrow and DEAR GOD I GO BACK TO WORK IN A WEEK. Unless they pull out Vincent. Then it might be a little longer before work.

So, until I post a tear jerker post about how my child is practically already a grown up, I bid you adieu.

*A note about my gallbladder being named Vincent. My dear e-friend Poeia helped me name it. Vincent seemed the best since it makes me think of Vincent Price and I can only imagine my gallbladder being devious and having an awesome pencil-thin mustache.

So this pregnant lady takes a weekend trip to the north woods...

Alright, I knew that going on a weekend 5 hours away at 28 weeks might have been a little less than desirable, but I figured better now than in another 4 weeks, right? Right. (Just agree with me.)

For the most part, the drive up was uneventful. I was having a few more Braxton Hicks than normal, but whatever. Old news at this point. We luckily had a room in the cabin owned by a friend...which is awesome considering 12 of our closest friends were also staying at said cabin. So, I made up our beds (bunk beds, I had the top since I was SUPER claustrophobic on the bottom) and enjoyed the day. We made dinner (what I assumed to be low-fat and pro-gallbladder: chicken breasts and potatoes) and later I indulged in just ONE smore. JUST ONE. Not long after this point, the contractions were getting to be annoying and slightly worrisome, so I excused myself and went to lay down with the fafillion pillows I brought with. They wouldn't really calm down, and then my gallbladder started in on the fun. Did I mention the only toilet option was either an outhouse or a portopotty? BECAUSE THAT WAS IT. No flushing toilets. And then...the gallbladder hit. AWESOME. Needless to say, I went back to bed after some QT in the biffy and silently wished my demise to be more quick than was apparently going to play out.

The next day I felt better, gallbladder and contractions were back to normal. We spent the day in the sun and on the boat - it was quite fun. However, by evening, the braxton hicks were back in full swing. I ate dinner (this time, JUST chicken breast, and fruit) and laid on my left side...and nothing was helping. Finally, I called my clinic. I was getting worried - I was getting one every 5-10 minutes...and me being the worst mother-to-be...had NO idea where the closest hospital was should I need to go. I finally talked to the midwife on call and she suggested a hot compress of sorts and more laying down...and no more water. She attributed them to the fact that I had had a HUGE growth spurt in the past month (she kept saying "You gained FIVE POUNDS and FIVE CENTIMETERS in your fundal height" as if I wasn't already aware of this...but apparently it's enough to warrant additional braxton hicks.)

So, I went to bed, and after another full night's sleep - I was better again this morning. And I couldn't have been more excited at the prospect of spending 5 hours in the car because it meant I was THAT much closer to flushing toilets and a bed that's not 4.5 feet off the ground.

I hope you've enjoyed my recap of traveling at 28 weeks with a shitty gallbladder and a uterus that just won't quit. Don't get me wrong, I had a lot of fun...but I'm seriously reconsidering any travel I may have to endure in the next couple of months.

Avocado episode, part II.

I ended up calling the nurses again yesterday about my pain, and they had me come in.

Before the midwife made his decision as to what was ailing me, he heard my complaints and aches and whatnot, then had me lay down so he could measure me and hear the baby - the old ute is 29cm long (grew by 5cm from a month ago) and he was BAFFLED at how short waisted I am. He said I have less than a foot between my hip and the bottom of my ribcage. (That's not normal?) if I'm not already having aches in my ribs and back, they'll be starting soon because there's no where else for the baby to go. Great. Thanks mom! Just kidding. I know you didn't choose this short-waisted-ness either. Do we blame my grandmother?

Anyway, he said in the end he thinks that it IS my gallbladder being a jerk, but doesn't suspect stones or anything, just acting up with higher fat intake, less space to function and good old hormones throwing off the delicate balance of my organs. He said I just need to officially change my diet and cut out all high fat (or relatively fatty) foods. He wasn't too concerned with the itching (my feet and hands were kind of itchy over the weekend), but said if it's more constant and consistent that I should call in. (See the concern about itchiness of hands and feet here.) But he's pretty secure in the thought that with a lower fat diet that I should be feeling better in no time.

The state fair starts next Thursday. So much for everything on a stick! (He said I can have a pickle on a stick, but what I really want is deep fried pickle slices dipped in ranch dressing. Nom nom nom.)

So, after all that, I ended up getting my Rhogam shot so I don't have to go back in again tomorrow.

I'm hurting again today...just in that spot under my ribs, but dealing. It just sucks...and watching what I eat is REALLY going to suck. Not to sound like "that girl" - but I've never had to watch what I eat. Reading labels is very foreign to me. Although, I discovered that the donuts I bought at the grocery on Sunday may have been hurting me - 55% of daily value of SATURATED FAT in EACH ONE. Ooops. I suppose I could cut those out.

(look at that frosted goodness)

But seriously? Entenmann's chocolate devil's food cake donuts?! They are SO GOOD...eating one is almost worth the pain. Almost.

This is what I found on a website of what to avoid when you have gallbladder issues. It's laughable.

Eggs, pork, onion, fowl, milk, coffee, oranges, grapefruit, corn, beans, nuts, in that order.
Trans fats
Hydrogenated, partially-hydrogenated oils
Margarine
Fried Foods
Saturated fats(even coconut oil until feeling better)
Red meats
Dairy products
Eggs
Coffee, regular or decaf
Chocolate
Ice cream
Black tea
Alcohol, beer, wine, liqueur
Fruit juice
Carbonated water
Tap water
Raddishes and turnips
Cabbage, cauliflower
Colas and all sodas
Oats (for some people)
Wheat
Barley
Rye (although the sour German ryes seem to be less troublesome)
All legumes (beans) as they tend to increase the cholesterol in the bile.
Avoid all artificial sweeteners, sugar, preservatives, refined and bleached foods (like white flour)

So, I can't drink water, juice, milk, tea, coffee or soda. That leaves....what? This list is ridic.

WebMD's article makes more sense. Maybe I'll pay attention to that one instead.